The Bludge's Blog

Seeking acceptance from the intarwebs

Whole Lotta Yellin’

Posted by The Bludge on March 4, 2010

Top 10 Girls!

So, good news!
Crystal Bowersox is going to perform today!
The thing is, we don’t know WHY she was in the hospital!!!
ARGH!!

She sounded just fine, so I am assuming it was not throat related.
She walked down the stairs fine so I’m assuming it wasn’t leg related.
She played guitar, so I’m assuming it wasn’t arm related.
I’m guessing maybe she’s diabetic?
Or possibly she’s an alien.

ANYheadlice, Crystal performed first, she sang Creedance’s “As Long as I can See the Light” and it occurred to me during, that no one has told her she’s been pitchy, like most of the contestants here.
I really like her, though I wish she’d open her eyes more and connect with the audience, it kind of feels like she’s shutting us out.

Crystal reminds me of someone and I can’t tell if it’s just Julia Stiles or if there’s someone else in my (usually bankrupt) memory bank…

Did anyone else think she had just a bit of teeth work done? Maybe some lightening?
That just gave me a mental picture of a lightening bolt hitting her teeth.
Hmmmmm, maybe THAT’S why she was in the hospital!!!!


Um, so why does Kara’s ponytail have its own afro?

AI REVIEW



Going second was Haeley who, we learned, makes headbands with Elmer’s glue.
Damn, HOW old is she!?
Haeley is going to sing “The Climb” by Miley Cyrus. Well, if she’s in tune .05% of the time, her version will be about 700 times better than Miley’s…

Oh, no.

Bad news.

It’s JUST like Miley’s version.

RIGHT after I wrote down “I REALLY wish they hadn’t let her in because she’ll be so much better in a year’s time,” Kara said almost the EXACT same thing.
I knew I liked her.
This season.


#3 Lacey Brown.
Lacey showcased her artistic talent in her video before she performed. I’m jealous!!
She’s taking Kara’s advice and singing Six Pence None the Richer’s “Kiss Me.”
I think her sound was MUCH better this week, but after watching the first 20 seconds of her performance I didn’t really watch the rest because none of it was that interesting.
I was impressed by her ability to walk on 7 inch heels that were microscopically thin. Ok, they were more like 3 or 4 inches, but they were REALLY skinny!!


#4 Katie Stevens
Trying to sound younger than last week, when she sang 34-year-old Michael Buble’s version of “You Know How I Feel”, Katie sang “Put your Records On” by Corinne Bailey Rae.

Here’s the thing.

Corinne is 31.


#5 Didi Benami
AAAAAAAaaaaaahhhhhh I just think Didi is SO CUTE!!!!!!
Benami is such a different name I had to look it up. I think it is Israeli?
Speaking of names, I was curious as to what Didi is short for and I found that it is not short for anything, her real name-if the internets are correct (namely http://www.thehollywoodgossip.com) is Vered.
Also, I learned the reason that Tim Urban is on the show is because (quickly forgotten) Chris Golightly was booted from the top 24 because he had signed an exclusive contract with a boy band.

YAY INTARTUBES!!!

ANYJewy, Didi sang “Lean on Me” and I liked it but I didn’t think the judges would…and they didn’t.
I think almost crying might have garnered Didi a few extra sympathy votes.


#6 Michelle is gorgeous and reminds me of Leona Lewis mashed up with Janet Jackson.
She sang Creed’s “With Arms Wide Open” and while it wasn’t SPECTACULAR, it was good.
But, why is she wearing the top half of a wedding dress?

I think the judges will say it was pitchy and weird.
Oh good, at least Kara and Simon liked it, I would like to keep Michelle around cuz she’s nice to look at.

OMG it really is a wedding dress! It’s a Vera Wang who (SHOCKINGLY) is in the audience.


#7 Lilly Scott
Singing Sam Cook’s “Change is Gonna Come”, just like about 1,700 other Idol contestants.
Hey! Lilly plays the melodica!! Thanks to Mel of Sirsy or I wouldn’t know what that thing is!
She looks great but I am just NOT getting this performance…granted, it’s about 12 seconds into it…this song is just…weird.
Now SHE needs to sing Paula Abdul’s “Straight Up!”

I just DON’T get it, the judges LOVED it.
Yeah, I think she has a cool voice and she seems cool but she has an indie voice and not a soulie (what?) voice.


#8 Katelyn Epperly.
DAMN.
She fine.
Wait, she’s over 18, right?

She’s singing “The Scientist” by Coldplay.
Wow, I like the dramatic lighting and everything, she’s going to play the piano and sing!!
WHY are all of these people so talented!? Where’s mine!?

How did they get the piano out on that round stage?

I love her.
How the hell is she playing the piano in 4 inch platforms?


#9 Paige Miles
Um. Paige’s little mini-bio revealed that she likes to color.
She colors.
Wow.
That is about as interesting and mature as picking your nose (don’t act like you don’t do it too).

I like her personality. She’s doing “Walk Away” by Kelly Clarkson
She didn’t sound different than Kelly.


#10 Siobhan
Does she have a lisp, too?
She is going to tackle Aretha Franklin(haha wouldn’t that be funny!?)’s “Think”.
Little girl does have a big voice but she’s singing from the back of her throat/nose area and oh no, now she’s yelling and screeching a bit.
Some of her yelling was bad, but at least once it was perfect!



I know you guys are totally waiting to find out who I think is going home!!
For the gals I think Katie and Lilly, for no particular reason.
And the guys? Andrew & Todrick.
NO idea why I chose them either.


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3 Responses to “Whole Lotta Yellin’”

  1. diane said

    What happened to Anywhore? I miss anywhore

  2. Nanci said

    You have a bug planted in my sofa cushions don’t you? It IS Julia Stiles, the pony tail looks like a horses actual tail when he raises it to take a dump and the lisping is OUTTA control.

    That is all.

  3. Linwood Tuner said

    Hey this is a great post. I’m going to email this to my friends. I stumbled on this while googling for some free song downloads, I’ll be sure to come back. thanks for sharing.

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